Breakdown point

These days, everybody is worry and tense to hear about new announcement or news.

Okok.. It's me who is worry and stress to hear announcement and news. To make it more clearer, I also worry about all the "rumours" will come to real.

I wonder am I the only one has this kind of feeling. I kept thinking, what is my back up plan if something really happen. What can I do or what should or what will I do when something worse happen.

Just early this week, there was a NTU undergraduate who stabbed his supervisor and committed suiside after that. I wonder, what happened to him causing him to have this kind of reaction. Is it really a very very very super extremely serious breakdown to him? I guess no one really know.

Back to think of myself, will I somehow someday in future have the similar reaction as him? How much can I take my stress? Will I really breakdown when something worse really happen?

I do not know. And I hope I will never reach to that point to get these answer.

These few weeks, I tried to find something to do every night after work to clear my mind, to release my worry and tension. Some of you may know, I been in facebook more often these few weeks. I am sort of addicted to some of the games inside. With them, I tried to recover from my anxiety and frustration.

Thanks to HC that he need to listen to what puked or vomitted out from my mind because of all the anxiety I have.

But how am I going to continue when there are scary rumours or anouncement every two days.

S.O.S.
Someone out there, please teach me...

AM, be strong......